I was looking back through the wedding pictures this week. It’s been almost a month and it seems like a lifetime ago. Our daughter and her new husband looked so happy. Their friends gathered around them. Everyone had a great time and the event was absolutely gorgeous.

But then, I looked closer and realized how many people worked to make that one event happen. The DJ was amazing. I found him by connecting with some Drag Queen friends, who recommended this guy as one of the best. He kept the party hopping from the first song to the last. And, we made a new friend in the mix.

The flowers were probably the most amazing part. Our friends are florists, so we asked them to do a few simple arrangements. They decided we needed more, so they brought more – lots more. There were gorgeous arrangements everywhere you looked. They have such amazing talent and I’m glad to call them my friends.

Our florist friend’s husband took the day to help with hair. The bride is a stylist, as are many of her friends, but I knew they wouldn’t have time to do the family members’ hair for the wedding. So, we hired him for the day. Our daughters were gorgeous thanks to all of his work.

We purchased the wedding cake, but the groom’s cake was a family effort. The bride and some of her siblings made that come together beautifully. I did the final decorations on that cake and was thrilled with the result. It looked like a barrel filled with ice and beer cans and was perfect for this groom. I also altered all of the bridal party dresses and made sure they fit correctly. With little time left, I set out the various decorations for the day and focused on the little details that are often overlooked.

The event staff made everything seem effortless, even the specific details we requested. The food, which had been a little bland for the original tasting, was absolutely wonderful. Some of our sons helped hang draperies in front of French doors, to soften the lighting. And, everyone carried boxes and bags to and from their various destinations.

And, the pastor, a friend and colleague from way back, made the ceremony personal and sweet. No one who didn’t know our family well could have done such a marvelous job. My brother and his family helped make sure my Dad’s house and lawn looked amazing for our Day After party, bringing in new lawn chairs and his massive smoker to cook the food. We hired a friend who cleaned and made his house look amazing. The entire family showed up early to cook and set up, including our friend and his husband who put so much energy into the day. I performed their wedding ceremony just over a year ago. We keep trading off on helping with events.

Overall, we had two magical days for our daughter and new son-in-law. But, my biggest takeaway is my appreciation for all of the friends and family who stepped up to help. There wasn’t a moment that was overlooked. Everything was lovely. And, it showed me how much “family” is really family when it comes down to it.

So here’s my official thank you to everyone who helped out. And, here’s the hoping you have people around you who love and support you in the good times and bad. In our world, blood doesn’t make a family. Love does.

The picture is of Todd and Jeffrey who did so much, flowers, hair, food, etc. Todd is one of my unofficial kids.

Rev. Kelly Crenshaw is the mom of 16 adopted kids, two biological kids, guardian of one baby girl and foster mom of dozens. Some are lesbian, some gay, some straight, and some bisexual. Kelly founded a K-12 day school where kids could have a safe, bully-free environment for learning. She is co-owner of a counselling agency that works with children and their families.

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Rev. Kelly Crenshaw
Rev. Kelly Crenshaw
Rev. Kelly Crenshaw is the mom of 16 adopted kids, 2 biological kids, Guardian of one adorable toddler, and has been the foster mom of dozens. Some are lesbian, some gay, some straight, and some bisexual. Kelly founded a K-12 day school where kids could have a safe, bully-free environment for learning. She has worked with kids in the foster care system for over two decades, actively advocating for all kids, but especially those in the LGBT community. And, in her spare time, she can be found preaching in some of our area’s most LGBT-friendly churches. Feel free to send your parenting questions to her at Pastor.Kelly@comcast.net.
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