Decisions, Decisions

At this point in the pandemic, saying that life is weird is both obvious and an understatement. We’ve endured lockdowns, ongoing debates regarding the legitimacy and importance of science, and we’re living through several social movements that are changing the fabric of our nation. It’s becoming more and more clear that a return to pre-pandemic life is not possible because that world no longer exists. What comes next is anyone’s guess. It’s this aspect of the pandemic that I find to be both incredibly interesting and unbelievably frustrating. In some ways it seems the world has stopped while continuing to […]

Isolation and Delusion: Ye and Mental Health

Two years ago, I wrote a column for Role Reboot about why I had purged my music library of Kanye West, with the exception of Chance the Rapper’s Coloring Book (Slavery is a Choice comments). That album is an audible masterclass on black excellence, and very much a product of the latter’s talent opposed to the former’s ego. 2020, the year that will go down as our true reckoning with the systemic oppression that has propped up the fabric of our country as it continues to spawn with our celebrity-saturated-culture, would not be complete without Ye entering politics, complete with […]

Calling All Rodeo Fans!

The fourth annual Keystone State Gay Rodeo rides into Red Man Ranch & Arena (359 Strawberry Road, New Freedom, Pennsylvania) Saturday, October 3rd, starting at 11:30 am. The rodeo is family friendly, community event where both men and women, members of the LGBTQ community and their straight allies will compete equally in all rodeo events. The rodeo will feature some traditional rodeo events such as calf roping, barrel racing, and chute dogging, and includes some unique rodeo events, such as goat dressing, the wild drag race, and steer decorating. Admission for adults 13 and over is $10 each and admission […]

In This Time And Place

I didn’t know what I was getting into, but I knew it wouldn’t be easy. Back in March, in what I’ve begun referring to as “The Before Times”, the idea of a lockdown wasn’t so bad. My two-and-a-half year tenure as my father’s caregiver had come to an abrupt end shortly before the new year. I was grieving and exhausted; I welcomed the opportunity to stay home and take care of myself. At first it wasn’t so bad. I thought of it like a snow day, a separate and almost surreal (in a good way) reality during an otherwise devastating […]

It’s Not About You

I did not get my break. I have one on the books for this month, but in actuality, work is the least of my stresses. At least when I am checking guests in I get a reprieve from social media, where I can watch the parents of my former classmates argue over whether or not I hypothetically deserve the right to exist, or bemoan restaurants and businesses that have the audacity to choose public safety over personal convenience. Moreover, while the lack of a clear defined and implemented effort to combat said virus seems to be coming from our esteemed […]

I Need a Break

My heart hurts and my head is tired. It has been a week, and in five days’ time when this releases; I am unable to hypothesize where my moods will be. Not simply that I cannot speculate how I will be feeling, but realistically I could not have guessed NASCAR siding with me before the author of my favorite series about magical children studying at an English boarding school as a real event happening in my life. In light of that reality becoming canon, I am leaving my prophesizing skills in the dust that will hopefully soon render this year […]

We Are Not Ready to Heal

I cancelled a Zoom meeting this afternoon. It was a 60-minute commitment that did not require me to wear pants or deodorant, or do anything other than clicking an application on my computer, and yet I woke up this morning and immediately knew I simply could not. Even before I regretted checking the latest round of “White America Debating Racism Today” on various social media platforms, I was already trying to sidestep the wall I had just slammed into face-first upon awaking. It is always exhausting being a minority in this country. Something about the whole stealing the continent from […]

My Summer Body

This one makes me really nervous. Obviously this photo is intimate and sensual and I realize that’s not going to be everyone’s cup of tea — especially not for folks who knew me in The Before Times™. I’ve been sort of tacitly dreading the day we’d get here because I feel like I’m at a real crossroads. For the last 30 years of my life I have hated this body with every fiber of who I am. It disgusted me to look at, let alone be trapped in. I spent 30 years living in that body and following unnatural and […]

Desperately Seeking Dazzle

(Or How I Got My Groove Back) Social isolation is hard. A few weeks ago I reached the point of full blown existential crisis. I had been alone for over a month and there wasn’t much positive news coming in. It was hard to imagine the world, and life, after the pandemic. Many of my plans have been derailed and, not knowing what the future holds, I was feeling lost and dismayed. It felt like life as I knew it was over and I didn’t know where or how I would fit into the new world. I was telling a […]

Generation “O”

Generation “O”, my definition for Generation “older”. To be an older gay male in today’s society and a double whammy, to be single, really sucks. No pun intended! How did we get to be where we are today and are we relics? How do we begin to date and be taken serious? When I was in my 30’s I thought I knew where I would be today in my early 60’s. Guess again. Life will throw you so many curve balls. I have people tell me, “You don’t look 62, I thought you were early 50’s” and it’s flattering because […]